To Marry or not to Marry?

What is the hurry? Why do people need to rush into marriage because “it is time?” A couple has been together for almost 5 years and that automatically means that they have to rush to the alter. Why?

I find that question nagging at me constantly.

I am 21 years old and my boyfriend of almost 4 years is 31 years old. I am still in college heading toward my senior year after this summer and my boyfriend, Mike, is already grounded with his own business, job and life.  Just because we have been dating for so long, everyone who meets us or knows us has asked when we are getting married knowing that we aren’t even engaged yet. Kind of takes the surprise and mystery out of a proposal doesn’t it? Each time we are both asked, “When are you getting married?” we both look at each other or just shrug. I am always tempted to say…”We will let you know when the time comes,” and leave it at that. Now I can relate to Kim Kardashingan with her fustration of reporters asking her when she will marry Reggie.

Worst of all, my parents are trying to corner me with an ultimatum. They are telling me that I need to either marry Mike or come to Florida with them. My father is already planning to get me a job even though I had not asked him of it. I am not interested anymore in my major, journalism but they haven’t even considered that little factor with them being so busy planning out my life and how they think it should be.

By Puerto Rican standards, I am not allowed to live with Mike without being married and so the dilema of where the heck I am supposed to go remains a question mark. Do I leave where I live and where Mike, the love of my life, lives, and catch a plane to Florida? Or do I marry Mike?

God, Mike hasn’t even proposed yet and now I feel like my parents are not only pressuring me but Mike as well to get hitched. All the world is wondering when? and Mike and I are wondering why?

I am a rebellious child in a sense of that fact that I HATE it when my parents try tell me what I need to do with MY life. I don’t rebel with drugs, alcohol or anything like that, but I do like to do the opposite that requires a delicate middle finger being pointed toward the sky. My parents don’t even know the half of it because the satisfaction is in the relief that I have a choice rather than showing them that. My parents rushing me to head to Florida, makes me want to do what they don’t want me to do. Live with Mike or be on my own with my own place and job. Of course I don’t want to live with my boyfriend unless I am married either so that leaves me with one choice….live on my own here?

My parents travel all the time. Since I have been in college they have already moved twice. First to TN and then to Florida. Why do I have to follow them? Especially, when they can just up and leave later! I dont want to follow them like a lost dog even if I love to be in FL. I mean it’s a fun place. There is always something to do, restaurants to eat at, people to meet, parks to visit. But none of those things sound appealing with out Mike to enjoy them with. And with him having his own business, he cant just up and leave here.

I want to get married to Mike. I do. I want to be his wife forever and live with him. But all this hype and annoying pressure makes me frustrated and almost rebellious at the idea. I just want people to shut up about it and I want my parents to help me make decisions when I ask them to, not when they feel like they need to do it for me without my permission. I appreciate their help, love, and all but they need to let me be for once.

Mike says he wants to marry me, but he wants everything to be a surprise, which is hard when everyone that finds out about us is constantly asking, probing and pressuring.

I don’t want to disappoint my parents but it has come to a point where I am getting fed up with the ultimatum. Has Mike proposed? Will Mike propose? When do you expect he will propose? Well if he doesn’t propose you have to be with us in Florida! Blah Blah Blah….

It is all a bunch of none sense. Where is the mystery in life? Where is the wonderful rush of love when it is unexpected? Most importantly, why have people still not learned to mind their own business?